We wanna protect the people we have around us, I get it, especially the children. But what if a cotton-candy-wrapped life is the worst gift to give someone?
How could you possibly learn about your own resilience without being exposed to situations when you need it? How can you know how strong you are if you never need to be strong?
I think we might be protecting kids a bit too much today. With two consequences; they don’t learn to develop the resilience that will undoubtedly be needed later in life and we we give them a frame of reference of what life could look like (in the cotton-candy-world) that will most likely never be matched in their adult life and so they might always be disappointed with how difficult life with responsibilities can be.
But I think we sometimes do that with each other as well. Someone comes to us with a problem, worry or pain and we “cotton-candy” all over it. Pretending as if life might not be quite difficult for a while. Because life is sometimes, for all of us. That’s okay.
What if the better thing to say is simply, yes, it might be difficult for a bit but I’ll be here with you. Yes, you can’t control everything so you might as well be with what is right now and trust that you’ll be able to deal with whatever if it happens later. Yes, this is hard but you are strong and you’ve survived so far.
All is well and all will be well. But still, it’s freaking hard being human sometimes. it’s part of our evolution. But we can handle it, we are strong. But to know our strength we need to flex our muscles from time to time.
Don’t only protect the people you love, stand with them in the storm and show them how capable they truly are.
With all my love,
Helena