purpose

Wasting life, is that possible?

Sitting on the Gatwick Express going into London, an action packed week ahead of me; staying with friends, meeting Danielle Laporte, taking the train to Paris for the weekend to spend time with my nieces who live there, going back to London for some more friends and a big talk on Monday night before I fly home on Tuesday night. Some kind of calm always come over me in situations like these. Calm because I know I’m living fully.

Summer vacation is always a bit stressful before I have planned everything out; knowing who to be with when and where. It’s not that I constantly have to do, do, do, but it needs to have some kind of purpose. If the purpose is relaxation then I’m fine with that.

But no purpose, no doing, no plan, that feels like waste. Anxiety-producing. I didn’t even know that that’s what I felt about it until I articulated it to a friend. She asked me why I was constantly running, learning, exploring, adventuring, moving… and I said it: “Otherwise it feels like I’m wasting life.”

It’s been lingering, since I said that. Can you really waste life? Is a life filled to the brink a life better lived than a more quiet one? Is doing a virtue at all?

Life quality is not about doing things, it’s about how you’re feeling as you’re doing what you’re doing (Danielle taught me that!). The more you get to feel the way you want to feel the better you’ll perceive your life quality. And the trick is to learn how to produce those feelings in the small things in your everyday so that you don’t have to wait for the few and far between grandiose moments in your life (which usually are overrated anyhow).

I don’t have an answer to this yet but her question is certainly getting me thinking. And this is where I’ll be for a bit I think. Enjoying the question without having to have a clear answer. Figuring out the balance between doing and being, between thinking and consciousness. I know where my edge is, where’s yours?

With all my love,

Helena

Stop striving for happiness

In the pursuit of happiness. I'm all in this with you. I write about it sometimes and I talk about it often. But it's not all about happiness. It's also about living. 

What if the goal would be feeling alive rather than feeling happy? What if we're in this human experience to do just that, living, no matter what that entails. 

You know what that they say; people rather be hated than ignored because that means someone actually care enough to have an opinion at all. The same way we might rather feel really tough feelings than feeling nothing at all. 

We're here to live and to experience and that sometimes means rough patches, that's alright, we're still living through them. There's no failure in being unhappy, it's part of the human condition to sometimes feel this way. What's closer to a failure is not living at all, because then we missed the purpose of the whole thing. 

So, embrace life, feel whatever you need to feel. And maybe you'll notice, that happiness comes to visit a little more often, when you stop resisting what's far from it.

With all my love,

Helena 

For a reason, for a season

I don't know who first mentioned this to me but I think it's a brilliant reminder. Everything in life comes to us for a reason and for a season. This is if you believe there is a meaning to everything that happens in life. 

Take the relationship that ended for example. You met, you bonded, you shared and you learned. Then something happened and the relationship ended. If you believe in meaning, there's a reason for this as well, your season is over. 

Not all relationships are meant to last a lifetime. I believe we have soul contracts with many people in our lives and we meet to learn and share experiences, and when we've learnt what we needed to learn, the relationship will end. Some relationships will last a lifetime, and those are important teachers. But, at the same time, sometimes we learn more from someone we meet on the street for ten minutes than we do from a lifelong relationships. That's all good. 

But remember, it doesn't have to be a bad thing when a relationship ends. It might very well have played out it's purpose. For a reason, for a season. 

With all my love,
Helena