Letting people see the darkness

As you probably know if you read these posts regularly, one of my themes of development right now is self-compassion. Something made the insight of what it practically means land in me a few weeks ago. After one of those meaningful insights there always a re-orientation happening in the weeks following. It's as if everything needs to be looked at again but from a new perspective. 

Where my weakness lies I don't want to let others in because that's where I can't love myself. And where I can't love myself I find it unlikely that anyone else would. This is a real dilemma since no one can show me I'm lovable until I give them a chance to love me everywhere and I find it hard to let anyone in where I don't love myself.

I have a strong inkling this is one of the main themes of my next book. I'll let you in on my progress and hopefully, I'll also let you in to my weakness.

With all my love,


You're more free than you think

It seems everyone is looking to be free. But do we really know what it is? Free with time. Free from judgements. Free from expectations. Free to speak. Free to act. Free to be whoever you want to be. Have you defined your own longing? 

What if you are more free than you think? What are the cages you've built around yourself? Are they really real? 

I think we sometimes feel caged when we're not. We use all the should's and have to's as excuses to hide from our own freedom. The change of perspective to need and want can give you the freedom you're seeking. You're responsible for your own life and your choices. This also gives you permission to let go of some of the things you feel are keeping you chained. That is if you want or need it, not because I say so. 

The lack of freedom we sense in our life is more something we keep affirming than any object reality. 

I've also been thinking a lot about whether total freedom is really something to strive for and something that really feels free, but more on that in another post. For now, reflect on what freedom means to you. And then, start affirming more of it in your own life. 

With all my love,


Focus on your circle of influence

We might be able to change the whole world in one full sweep, but we can change a little at a time. Instead of getting frustrated about the state of the world focus on where you have influence. 

Could you help your neighbor or an immigrant close to where you live? Do you have some contacts in your network that would benefit someone else? Is there a charity where you can contribute your money, time or other resources? Is there a discussion that needs to be held where you can take the lead? Do you know someone with a podcast, vlog or blog where you can share your ideas? Are there conversations that you can have in your family to broaden everyones perspective? 

No one can do everything but everyone can do something. We change the world person by person, initiative by initiative and conversation by conversation. Don't ever think that you don't matter! 

With all my love,


In the perspective of eternity

It's easy to get overwhelmed in this human experience. We look at everything we have going on. We engage in our own drama. We feel fully. We get caught up in what everyone else is doing. We compare. 

When I need some perspective to my own stuff. I contemplate eternity. Given we are spiritual beings, having a human experience, eternity isn't that far fetched. We're here for such a short period of time. My current life, in contrast to all, is not that significant. It doesn't mean it's not important, of course it is, but it's not that big of a deal really. 

Always, when I take this perspective, I feel such compassion for our species and for myself. We work so hard. We push and strive. We always try our best. We fail, often. We hurt ourselves and each other. And we forgive. We compare ourselves to others. We think and we feel and we get completely lost in our everyday life. 

On top of this we wonder if we need to buy a sofa. If we'll make the work deadline. We worry what other people will think of our kids. We plan the next vacation and use our credit card to fill some kind of void. We long for a cup of coffee and we forget to call mom. We skip the stretching, again and we obsess about that new Netflix series. 

So. Much. Compassion. The things we do. In the perspective of eternity. 

With all my love,